I was talking with a new friend yesterday and she said, “If we’re alive in Christ why do we get offended when people say dumb stuff?” This was in response to my post about the “R” word. When she said that I though, “Yea, why?” Then I thought, “I get offended all the time. Even if I appear that I’m not offended. I usually am.”
Is it because we aren’t secure? Is it because we want to be someone we aren’t? Is it because we aren’t secure in our identity?
Again, I feel like it’s a matter of our hearts. Where our hearts are in Christ and where we place our identity. Too many times, I place my identity in what people think about me. I want them to think good of me. Even in my faults I’ll embellish to get praise. I want people to think that I have it all together. That life is wrapped up in a sweet looking box, but the fact is it’s not. It’s life and life is messy. Life is offensive. Life is struggle.
I’m also hate confrontation. Hate with a capital H.A.T.E. When I’m offended, I’d rather go running for the hills and crawl in a hole rather then confront the person who hurt me. When I have offended I want to do the same thing, because of my shame and guilt. I’m a quick hider. I’d make a good turtle.
I don’t have any words of wisdom or much of merit to share, because this is something I struggle with. I’m quick to be offended and not show grace. I may show “grace” face to face, but I am not gracious in my heart. It’s a convicting lesson for me.
What do you do when you’re offended? How do you respond? Do you hide like me or react with your words quickly and without thought? We can all learn from one another.