My Favorite Boy

My favorite boy.  My first born.  My funny boy.  My gentle boy.  My tough-guy boy.  My smart boy.  That is my Josiah. 

We had been trying to get pregnant for a  year.  We found out that I was pregnant at the Grand Canyon.  Suddenly, that Canyon didn’t seem so grand after we got the most amazing news of our life! 

It was the most typical and boring pregnancy.  He was also 6 days late!  He got kicked out.  When Mike said that the baby was a boy, I cried!  My boy.  My favorite boy.  I had wanted a boy.  I thought of sword fights, car races, trucks, trains, building blocks, legos, dirt, trees, bugs…all of those wonderful boy things.  He was a perfect boy.  Beautiful and handsome.  (He still is)

In the morning, Josiah will be six.  SIX!  6!  It will take two hands to show his age!  It’s hard to believe that it’s been six years since he cried his first cry.  He’s had many scraps and bumps, and cracked heads since then.  (Well, he only cracked his head open once, and that was taken care of with 3 staples.)  He has also lost 6 teeth in time for his six birthday!  I think that most have grown back, but hey, he’s lost six teeth before he turned six!

Josiah is a smart boy.  He enjoys school (most of the time) and he enjoys his sisters (most of the time).  There have been many times where he has told us things that have made us stop in our tracks.  He has corrected us when we were wrong.  Sometimes in the middle of our sin.  Like, “Mom, why are you talking at me like that?”  or “Mom, that’s not a patient voice.”  I stop in my tracks and try to pull myself together.  Apologize to him when I’m pulled myself up off the floor.   Aren’t our children little “convictors” sometimes? 

Josiah is a protector of his sisters.  Sometimes, I think we’ll put too much pressure on him to be more then he is.  To demand more then maturity will allow.  Having a sister with special needs will do that to a kid.  I try not to make him feel like he’s “in charge”, but yet we also want him to have a sense of “protector” over his sisters.  To love them so much that he wants to take care of them.  I see this coming out more and more.  He’ll hold their hand crossing the street.  Or hug them after a wrongdoing and apologize.  Sometimes I’ll walk into the family room while the kids are watching a show and Josiah has his arm around one of the girls.  He’ll talk about them too when their taking naps or not in the room, “Mom, I really love Tullie.”  or “Mom, isn’t Ellison funny.  She’ll eat everything!”  Don’t get me wrong, there is sibling rivalry, but when I see him or hear him treating his sisters lovingly and watching out for them, it warms my heart.  I know that he loves them. 

Josiah has a tender heart.  He loves his brother.  He misses Eli.  He brings it up and random times.  He asks to see Eli’s pictures.  Sometimes he’ll mention that he wishes that he could play with Eli.  At these moments my heart hurts for him.  The loss of a brother.  The loss of brotherly love and playing cars together and lightsabers.  However, he will quickly add that he’ll see Eli in heaven and they can play together there.  It’s at those times, that I am reminded of simple faith. 

Josiah loves Tullie and knows no different.  Tullie is Tullie.  She’s going to take longer to learn things, but Tullie is his sister and, well, she’s pretty cool.  Josiah is Tullie’s encourager!  He’ll call me when he sees Tullie do something new or say a hard word.  Even when he was two and three, Josiah came running to tell me that Tullie rolled over or sat up.  Those were exciting times. 

Josiah is snuggly.  I’ve been blessed with three snuggly children.  Josiah will come and ask, “Can we snuggle?”  He has been a wonderful comfort.  When words would not suffice, he could snuggle with us and I knew that I was loving my son.  It was healing for us both.  Through much of our grief, I don’t know if Josiah understood what was going on, but he knew that something was wrong.  Those snuggles are special.  If my six year old still wants to snuggle, I’ll snuggle, because in a year he may be done with that. 

Josiah, you’re mamma and daddy love you very very very much.  You’re our favorite boy.  We’re proud of you.  We’re thankful for the things that you’ve taught us in these last six years.  We pray that you’ll have Jesus’ heart.  That you will seek Him. Love Him.  Desire Him.  We pray for your mind to continually be opened to Jesus and His creation that He created.

Welcome to year number six!  You’re our favorite boy.